I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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