Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
she told me i tasted like america
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
