is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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