I hope mine doesn't look like that
Acid is not a monday night drug
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
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