sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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