A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Randomize
