I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
