how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
Randomize
