You're completely useless in the revolution.
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Well I just put wine in my tea
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
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