we're blogging at a bar
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize
