is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
