would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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