I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
