oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
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