Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Dicks are not precious.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
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