I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
Be still, my beating vagina.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
