How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
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