belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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