he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
