and i looked up. we had an audience...
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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