I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
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