kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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