okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Randomize