Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
