I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Randomize
