I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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