Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
