found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Randomize
