y did u give ur computer a hand job?
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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