So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
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