dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
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