ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Randomize
