why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
