I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize
