So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
