We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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