i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
