can u get pink eye on your cock?
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Randomize
