just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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