We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Randomize