Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I just blew my weed a kiss
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
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