i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
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