the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
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