is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Randomize