Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
Randomize
