Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
PANTIES FOUND
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