): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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