So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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