Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Randomize
