Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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